Field Munchies

 

Submitted by Eric Daniel

I had an epiphany about butter the other day. Back when I was stationed in Germany we had an opportunity to train with some German tankers.  Now I’d heard all the jokes about why we were, at the time, patrolling the German borders instead of the German army (“the only nation that doesn’t respect Germany’s borders is Germany,” or “German tanks don’t come with breaks,” or “The problem is, once the German Army gets to the border, it tends to keep on going…”) but I tell you, those guys were flat out aggressive.  When they went on the attack, they took it to you.  There was no creepy-crawling in those Leo IIs.  They were on the move all the time, and by on the move I mean moving flat out.

Anyway, adding insult to injury was the apparent fact that these panzer guys did all this on a diet of black bread and butter.  Any time we were laagered up together for an AAR there they’d be, sitting on their little efficient field stools with a tin of butter and a square of black bread, having a snack while the O/C explained to us how they just handed us our asses.  At the time, what I really found intriguing was the little aluminum tin they had for keeping the butter.  It was about 1.5” tall, 3” in diameter, and has a three lug locking lid.  Inside was a plastic liner, and the lid itself had a rubber gasket to seal it.  I glommed on to one of those tins in an attempt to emulate them (black bread and butter is quite tasty, actually) but maintaining a supply of bread and butter was always an issue (they got theirs delivered with LOGPAC.) 

Anyway, the years go by and there I am, sitting on a hill looking at a bunch of Seabees go about their business (we were doing recon and surveillance training) when several thoughts went through my head.  First, the wheat snack bread they put in the MREs now isn’t half bad, and second, when it get’s really really hot, the issue cheese spread isn’t very appetizing.  That’s when I had my epiphany.  “What if I broke out my old West German butter tin?”  That would be nice, except that it gets a whole hell of a lot hotter in the Mojave than it does in Bavaria and the idea of carrying a tin of butter soup around to dip my bread in didn’t sound all that appealing. That’s when brainwave #2 occurred.  Use that European wunderfood, nutella.  For those of you who’ve never had it, nutella is a chocolate-hazelnut spread that goes very well with bread.  It’s tasty, and unlike butter, it will soften, but not melt completely, in the heat, so even on the hottest of days, it’ll keep it’s form well enough to spread, and used sparingly, a tin full of nutella will last me several weeks. 

Now if I can just get one of those Leo IIs…

Get a German Army butter tin here.

Comments

[wow gold]

Nutella has been my family's favorite for years but when the salmonella outbreak began, we avoided any food that has any peanuts on it. Is Nutella safe? I'm just worried about the salmonella thing.

[canis]

Well nutella is hazelnut and not peanut so it should be fine. In fact it is just sugar, hazelnuts, cocoa, milk, some soy emulsifiers, and vanillin (fake vanilla). And yes I have a jar of nutella in front of me right now with the ingredients.

[Eric Daniel]

Canis, I was just about to say the same thing (looking at my jar too.) Since there are neither peanuts, nor pistachios (The new scary nut) in nutella, you're safe.

[Mike]

Schwartzbrot, Nutella, OMG talk about a "blast from the past"! Yes, we had our encounters with our Bundeswehr counterparts too; but our nemesis was that damned Marder! (We had the M113A1). Still, they had some goodies that they'd swap for C-Rats...Yeah, I'm old...

[Eric Daniel]

Mike, Yeah, the marder was a nice piece of kit. I also was a big fan of the spähpanzer luchs. I thought they were great recon vehicles.

[Mr.Sparkle]

I don't know about all this scary nut business (must be American), but what about good old Peanut Butter too? Nutella can get a little sickly sweet.

[ACHefty]

I have an autistic son whose appetite and food allergies cause our options to vanish quicker than a sailor on shore leave. He LOVES this stuff!

[sniperbait]

Nutella is also good for body paint when you and your lady want to have some fun. Just warm it up, paint it on and lick it off.